Maps by Abhishek Anicca

I have constantly struggled with my body; be it disability or that I have been consistently overweight. Although I always knew that long term medication use, hormone related ailments and lack of movement due to growing impairment contributed to my weight, I could never accept my body as it was. While I have accepted disability and wear it on my sleeve, accepting my fatness is an ongoing process. Making this video is part of that process.

Abhishek Anicca is a writer, poet and spoken word performer based in Delhi, India. He is also a researcher working on disability and masculinity, and an activist who focuses on disability and sexuality. He identifies as a person with disability and chronic illness. Abhishek’s writing is published on popular news websites and in literary magazines such as Hardnews, DailyO, HuffPost India, Qunit and The Equator Line among others.

Transcript 

Here rests my fat body

in all its glory

Define your attempts

to defile me with your eyes

and turn me into another nation state

 

Here rests my fat body

full of shit

dripping with blood

sexual in bed

without regret

 

Here rests my fat body

in all its glory

unseeing the lines

that you said were ugly

redrawing the self

in praise of beauty

 

Here rests my fat body

ignoring your health advice

broken and unbroken

always healing

longing for love

 

Here rests my fat body

Behold

 

Published 19 May 2020